Come Ye Thankful People Come
Is being thankful something one can cultivate? I am really asking; I am not sure. In my mind, gratitude works on two levels: there is the emotional side and the rational side. They overlap. In the first, thankfulness comes over a person unbidden. This is when you feel thankful and you are not even seeking to be. The blessings of your situation come to consciousness, and you feel thankful and dwell in this state for a time. The second side of thankfulness is an exercise of awareness. In this process, you intentionally bring to mind the reasons you have to be grateful. You recognized things that have value to you, and people that bless your life. You acknowledge the conditions of your experience that make you know you are truly fortunate.
I think in the unbidden, the first description, of gratitude, it is important to give ourselves that moment at least, to really feel it as a gift received. There is no requirement for a person to rush past a feeling and move immediately back into a “to do” list or some other distracting pattern. Feelings don’t harm you; they are there to guide you. Don’t be afraid of them. They are a different kind of “nervous system”. Your physical nerves help you be aware of what’s going on with your body. Your feelings help you be aware of what is going on with your psyche, soul, or spirit. Take a moment and feel what you feel; use your words inside your head to bring a description to them.
In his book, The Center Will Hold, published this year, Christopher de Vinck suggests we “cherish what is simple, be in awe of what is great.” (The subtitle of the book is: An Almanac of Hope, Prayer, and Wisdom for Hard Times.) I think it is poignant the title is a reversal of a line in Yeats. His poem, The Second Coming, emerged right after the Great War in the throes of the Irish War of Independence, with race rancor going on, and in the midst of the flu pandemic of 1918-1919. Understandably William Butler Yeats is giving voice to the chaos felt, and the fear. The first four lines are worth noting here:
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world.
We too have been caught in the turning and the widening gyre of 2020. We are spun as in a centrifugal fashion: parts of ourselves breaking off and sent the edges. We feel we are about to lose bits of our core, but let us not fall into 2020 blindness to the good that remains solid and intact.
The way to cognitively cultivate gratitude is to note blessings and list them. This is best if it is routine. Not once a year in November, but more often. More than monthly more than weekly even. When we do Morning and Evening Prayer, I like to leave a short space of quiet time for personal intercession and thanksgiving. Imagine giving yourself a little time once or twice a day for acknowledging the good that comes to you. (Daily prayer as a live, interactive video or audio session is available to you on Zoom. I offer it daily; ask me, consult the church schedule.)
In the Spiritual Exercises of Ignatius of Loyola, 17th-century Spanish priest and theologian, we learn of a daily practice of reflection he called The Examen. This is a simple five-part process for observing how God is operating in your life through people and events. Look it up for yourself if you are curious. It is a practice for living gratefully.
I have a theory gratitude breeds gratitude. There are people for whom reasons to be thankful and feelings that go with it roll around in their being. This affects attitude, which in turn gives birth to the cheering of others. Live gratefully and it will spread.
Alas, the opposite dynamic and the reverse direction of mood can happen as well. Cultivating the thankful heart involves setting aside complaints, disgruntlement, and lists of what is lacking. I can almost hear the reaction, “Wait! Setting aside of what?” Oddly, we cling to our keen awareness of all that is wrong with, well, everything. Bill, a character from my church experience in another lifetime, was one to remind me many people are fond of living in the mode of “Ain’t it awful?” Be honest: would you be stumped if I asked you to name three things about 2020 that were awful? It would not be a problem. But to dwell in disappointment is not good for us. We are beckoned by God to move into what is promising and invites our participation. That is the better way. Commiserating gets us nowhere. Look at how Paul opens what we call his first letter to the Corinthians:
Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. I give thanks to my God always for you because of the grace of God that has been given you in Christ Jesus, for in every way you have been enriched in him, in speech and knowledge of every kind—just as the testimony of Christ has been strengthened among you—so that you are not lacking in any spiritual gift as you wait for the revealing of our Lord Jesus Christ. He will also strengthen you to the end. —1 Corinthians 1:3-8a
That is our Epistle for the Sunday coming, The first Sunday of Advent. Let it be for you a model of how richly encouraging you can be in your dealing with others. If you wish, come to the Eucharist at Church at 6:00 PM tonight, Tuesday, the 24th of November. It is all about Thanksgiving. Hey look: I drift toward curmudgeon and stay stuck on safe and neutral in conversation all the time, but there is every reason to do otherwise. There is every reason to be thankful, joyful, and hopeful. With a little practice, I can let gratitude reign in my heart, as Christ strengthens me, day by day.